Friday, April 29, 2005

the trick is...

the trick is...

the trick to not feel the shitty way i'm feeling right now. well - to remedy just 'part' of what i'm feeling right now ( which for some reason or another i can't rightly define...could be loneliness, could be dissapointment with myself, could be anger or it could even be a combination of all of it plus a lot of other things you know?) ... so the trick to not feeling 'part' of most of it is...i suppose - to master the art of being alone.

once you master the art of being alone then you'll never need anybody. fancy that huh? what life would be like when all you needed was yourself and that's plenty...it'd be interesting wouldn't it?

for one, you'd be comfortable with yourself. all your flaws - big or small ... are ok. just minor details. you wouldn't be sweating about all the small stuff. you can focus on shit that matters. and i'm talking about things that are really matters of consequence. stuff that you can reflect on and conclude quite conclusively that that's exactly what you wanted to do or want to do - as the case may be.

it is an inevitable consequence from the above that you'd then be able to solve a lot issues. life would be less complicated. it'd be easier. things would be clearer and you'd be a more purposeful person. not lost and confused and unsure. confidence would fall on your lap and flow out of your pores simply because you know what you're doing.

and come now, if you're thinking mastering the art of being alone is a chicken's way of dealing with things because you're shutting yourself up and escaping 'life' ... think again.

if you can admire someone for being brave enough to venture into the unknown - think about it - that someone is brave enough to venture into the unknown because he's not afraid of being alone when he gets there. well, actually if you really think about it - there could be a million reasons why someone would dare to venture into the unknown - but i think it's a real factor to consider. ie the reason its 'unknown' is because nobody has ever been there and that being the case it is highly likely that when you get there, nobody is going to be there ... doncha think?

but then again, you might get so good at it that you wouldn't know how to deal with anything else. because life involves other people. sooner or later, living in a society, you'll have to deal with people. so if you 'really, really' wanted to BE alone. you should go to a place where people hardly ever go to. some God forsaken place that people have really forgotten. timbakhtu wouldn't work either because people still keep talking about the place.

also - now this is the master prize of mastering the art of being alone - you get to master the art of being with someone else too. it's like learning to crawl before you learn to walk. learning to walk before running. it's the step by step way of living. people are always looking for a way to skip a step - to leap from point A to point C without having to deal with point B. maybe cutting a few corners here and there every once in a while is good but too much of anything can be disastrous - meaning if you skip too many point B's ... all you'd be left with would be a lot of loose ends and unfinished business. if you're really lucky - them loose ends don't come back to haunt you.

however, i think that very few of us are that lucky and most of the time, loose ends come back to you full circle and hits you right between the eyes.

thus, the better you are at being alone - the better you'd be with dealing with the world? maybe...only if you keep in mind to NOt forget how to be with other people too.
i guess then perhaps 'not forgetting' is the real trick.

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signing off, the commonjack.

20 comments:

Anonymous said...

Being alone is just shitty, but I agree that it does make one stronger. So are you alone at the moment or feel like you are alone??? Your blog sounds pensive and melancholic and yet trying to be alittle optimistic.

Sorry not 2 good with words...

michaelcsm said...

don't worry about about how i feel. comment more on the concept that is being addressed. like the 1st part of your comment ie:

"Being alone is just shitty, but I agree that it does make one stronger."

elaborate on something like that. :) for my next 'thought-provoking' entry.

my entries are generally not aimed at letting the world now what's going on in my head (exactly) more of the thoughts that are formed because of a state of mind i'm in.

so your observation that my, " ...blog sounds pensive and melancholic and yet trying to be a little optimistic" is right on the dot. i'm everything and nothing when i blog. ;)

like you - i save how i'm 'really' feeling for my own little pen and paper - not on a public blog.

Olivia said...

well i wish everyone would leave me alone.

oh hang on....

everyone has left me alone.

well what do u know...

michaelcsm said...

honeybosh -

i think i've told you this before. but i'll say it again. being alone - it's not something that 'just happens'.

a person chooses to be alone. it happens by choice.

sometimes its a good choice to make. but like i said in this blog entry - after mastering being alone or while tryin to master being alone, the trick is 'not to forget how to be with other people'.

Anonymous said...

I was alone for a long time & i think i was happy... but then... this person comes into my life & turns it upside down... & now i'm so afraid of being alone again... thing is... i'm hurting right now, but i gotta hang in there!!
i've been reading this blog for 2 days; i keep going over it... but i still can't find the strength... maybe i don't want to...

but why should abyone care

michaelcsm said...

fatima,

1st off, hi. you've been reading my blog for a mere 2 days and already felt compelled to leave a comment...? well - i guess you're really bothered by something.

what is it that you can't find your strength to do?

i'll try and help you out with my own 2cents if you want. :)

till then. take care.

Anonymous said...

i'm not so sure!! maybe it's a failed relationship i'm really afraid of!! don't worry about it... i think your post has helped me in a way... i gotta be strong for myself.. i need me right now

michaelcsm said...

fatima,

"i need me right now" ... that's cool. i get that. that's a good thing to do.

g'luck with your 'shit' then.

take care.

Unknown said...

ish ish

Olivia said...

wow, this is like something out of Dr. Phil.

Unknown said...

no ollie, YOU are somethin outta dr phil.

Olivia said...

hey HD you know Trisha yea?

my old housemate's sister and boyfriend, and ex-girlfriend went on the show, it was hilarious! we taped it and kept watchin it over. bloody funny i tell you.
i think they were arguing over whether he cheated on her or something, and whether the kid (my mates niece) was really his.

so much better than dr. phil.

michaelcsm said...

aih...so much for addressing the concept. :)

Unknown said...

indeed 'not forgetting' is the real trick... my friend taught me to never forget the good times & to keep in mind that i am blessed "because I HAD THAT!!"

*Dream Weaver* said...

Germ: I read your profile.(Interesting nick)and what you said is so true... "I've been in my fairytale world for the longest time ever. Ow, how I hate leaving it behind. It was so perfect! It promised me a Happily Ever After! I don't know who I am anymore" It really relates to me so well. Sigh... somehow I wish I could be ignorant and go on living in that world for I was atleast garenteed some happiness... =)

Yes, keeping in mind the wonderful moments provides us some certain light in the darkness of our weakess and sadness moments. I pray that one day you will get your own fairy tale ending... whatever it maybe.

Unknown said...

Dream Weaver... lets not spam dilattante's comments page... i'm actually flattered that someone likes my profile... in fact, i'd like to ask you to visit my blog ;)...
sorry about that dilattante, but so far, you're my favorite blogger :) but of course, you already know that

michaelcsm said...

germ,

thanks. it's nice to know someone likes my blog.

gotta go study now. will blog again after exams lah. so ... see ya round.

dilettante.

Olivia said...

uh, sorry for going off on a tangeant and not addressing the concept.
but u know me....

disco-very said...

woah. thanks for the new idea :)

michaelcsm said...

disco-very,

er...sure. no problem!

p/s: you are referring to my blog entry right? (i can't be sure - the comments on this entry seem to be about everything!)

:)