Acting & Writing.

it's 2.35 am. once, quite a while ago, i tried to explain what it is i like about acting and writing. this is a lame attempt at trying to articulate this fascination i have with acting and writing. but for now, it'll have to do. here it is...

ACTING and WRITING.
Take your worst fear, your worst insecurity, your worst fault or even you worst frailty. Take something so terribly heinous about yourself and share it. And you suddenly discover a whole other angle to something that used to be such a thorn in your heart and soul. It was something so bad that you would never share it with anyone and if things went your way, nobody would know about it and it will die and go to the grave with you. And it will be as if it never happened.
In fact, many people do get their way. If the dead could talk, I cannot even imagine the skeletons that might be unveiled in some closets.
That is what I love about acting and writing.
When I watch a good movie. Chances are, it is good for me because of the story and a story is sometimes only as good as the characters in it ie the people involved. One can always spin out a good story but if nobody cares about the people involved, the meaning would be lost.
The greatest moment for me would be if I could write and create a story or character, or act as a character sharing a deep and dark secret. Imagine if I had killed someone. Whether or not it was an accident is somewhat irrelevant. How would I react to it? If I could get away with it without anyone knowing, would I? What would the next person do?
If I lived out the rest of my life doing good in the society, like making millions of ringgit and giving it all back to the people who really needed it. but after 30 years of doing 'good', what if the news of the death resurfaces? How would I react to it? What would the next person do?
If you knew me and had been working side by side with me for the past 25 years, would your opinion of me change? What if you've been witness to all the wonderfully 'good little things' I've done over years as well? What would you think of me then?
Acting is to me a medium to allow questions like this to arise and be examined. Writing a story like that and being able to capture the reality of it would be a tremendous thing as well. The examination of people and how we all are the way we are is such an exciting and is wonderfully fascinating to me.
Take away the money, politics, religion, 'pop-culture', mass hysteria, jealousy, greed, bad manners, etc - all of which are mere products or 'scenarios' that are essentially inconsequential and take a good proper look at the 'people' involved. Things that basically serve to exploit and expose the 'ugliness' of human nature and realize that these things are part and parcel of what makes a human beautiful as well. The beauty of being human or perhaps a better word at this point would be the beauty of being a 'person'.
I am never much in tune with what is going on in politics whether it be my very own country, in school, college, university or even the office. What I see and can assess from all the situations mentioned coupled with the 'ugliness' of human behaviour is what I base my decisions and actions on. Sometimes when you least expect it, out of all the 'ugliness' something 'beautiful' is born.
Like a child born out of rape who eventually grows up and becomes someone who saves someones life 30 years later. Like a soldier risking his life in a 'meaningless' war (about politics) and saving or even sparing lives at the risk of his own. Think of the police officer who refused to take a bribe on one particular day and inspires a kid to become that type of police officer who 'never' takes bribes years later when he becomes a police officer himself.
All the 'little things' that lead to something bigger.
If I had an opportunity to act or write any of the above. It would be a wonderful experience.

and that's it.

signing off, the common jack amongst the kings and queens.